The Women's Dark T-Shirt I designed on CafePress.com

Men Get Raped Too- A response. (TW)

stfusexists:

This is an incredible piece of writing on the phenomenon that has become a meme of sorts, “What about teh menz?”. I really enjoyed this, instant follow.   

sexistculture:

You know, I just checked back in on this post, and something about this last response rubbed me the wrong way. Not because I disagree with anything it said on its own, just because I think it ignored a very real problem in responding to reactions in feminist discourse and I think it missed the context on what it was responding to. 


Here’s the deal: Straight cis men do get raped. Straight cis men do get abused. Straight cis men do suffer lots of problems because of weird patriarchal notions of masculinity. You’d be hard pressed to find a feminist that disagrees with those ideas. But here’s the thing: it can’t and shouldn’t dominate the conversation when women or trans men or LGBTQ folks talk about the type of oppression that THEY face. And it does! All the time, and in ways that are totally irrelevant.

When you read a post where a woman describes her rape trauma, and someone comes in and says “Well, men get raped too, what about the men?”, they’re not saying “We’re all potential victims of sexual assault, look at how awful this is, let’s examine it as one entity called “human” that is opposed to this type of behavior in all of its forms.” What they ARE saying is “STFU, woman. This isn’t just a woman problem, so you’re not allowed to talk about it in any terms that acknowledge your womaness, or gender as a factor at all. We don’t care that rape statistics show that women are much, much, more likely to be raped than straight cis men. We certainly don’t care that people with disabilities and trans people face even more severely heightened odds of being raped. We don’t care. Straight cis men get raped too. Therefore this is a non-story and you really shouldn’t be talking about it. Especially not in any context that we don’t agree with or approve of. Men get raped too, so your story is irrelevant.”

That’s why “But what about the menz?” is a meme in feminist circles. It’s because we see that idea ALL THE GODDAMN TIME. If we talk about about anything related to harassment, anything related to how we experience the world on a day to day basis, some asshole will come in and say “Men could conceivably experience that too, YOUR ARGUMENT IS IRRELEVANT.” It’s a derailing tactic. A way of telling us to Shut The Fuck Up, and center the conversation around the people that matter: straight white cis guys.

It’s a reminder that if we make the conversation about us and our own experiences, and we don’t go out of our way to acknowledge those straight, cis white guys… well, clearly it’s because WE are excluding THEM, and it has nothing to do with their inability to identify with us. Because they’re the default. So you can’t talk about human experience in female terms and have it not be automatically exclusionary to the guys that you are not talking about. Or the white people you’re not talking about if you’re discussing the experience of being a person of color. Or the straight people you’re not talking about if you’re talking about being gay.

And as a feminist, let me say this: Guys, I understand that bad things happen to you. I understand that you experience rape, harassment, problems related to sexuality and your masculinity. I get that. When I talk about me? It’s not because I’m refusing to talk about you. You’re allowed in. Share your stories, but stop acting like there’s something wrong with me if I don’t talk about yours every single time I talk about mine. Tell us what happened to you and how it made you feel and why you feel that way. Sit down at the proverbial table  with us, have a drink, and tell us what makes you sad about the world.

But don’t you dare fucking interrupt me while you do it. This is a conversation, and in a polite conversation you have to listen and wait for your turn.

(via tumblinfeminist)

yippy yippy yay yay

theatre-illuminata:

The Magnets have arriveth. (Does this make them magneths?)

In any case, there shall be a contest soon!

Operation: Sourdough

OK, so the first project is mostly indulgent. I will still be doing the dietary experiments, but as the weather gets cooler here, my thoughts turn to baking. Some of my fondest childhood memories are of bread baking with my Dad (though I think he largely used it as a way to keep smartass kids productively occupied between school and dinner, with the added bonus of supplementing dinner). We never did sourdough, and store-bought sourdough was not readily available in Seattle, at least we never bought it, until I was around 10 or 12.  But I have always loved the process of taking basically three simple ingredients and turning them into the miracle of bread. A basic white loaf is made from just flour, water, and yeast. An addition of milk, or butter, or cheese, or… any number of things can produce a richer, tastier, more tender loaf, but the basics are the original three- flour, water, yeast.

Sourdough simplifies the process even further, by drawing yeast from the air. A combination of flour and water, plus a little time should produce what it commonly known as a “sponge”. This naturally grown yeast is slightly fermented, which is what gives sourdough its tang. While  a crusty loaf, similar to French bread, is the ultimate in bread perfection, most of us don’t have ovens in our homes that get hot enough to produce one. The iconic ‘bowl’, hollowed out and filled with chili or chowder also falls into this category. So I intend to take it back to the original for starters (pun intended). Which is the humble, frontier inspired biscuit. (OK, I could, and may, go *all* the way back to neolithic inspired bread-this is more or less how cavemen leavened their bread, but that would require a coarser flour that I currently have in my kitchen).

In this first attempt, I have used just flour and water, which is not always enough. Some areas just don’t have enough natural yeast in the air to create the sponge. But here it is on day one:

Me age 3yr 3m

Me age 3yr 3m

Lovely pics I found on a friend’s blog.

fuckyeahtangled:

lovelymasoka:

Mucha Princess Series

  1. Ariel-Rebirth
  2. Snow White-Innocence
  3. Jasmin-Passion
  4. Belle-Ambition
  5. Rapunzel-Freedom
  6. Mulan- Warrior
  7. Alice-Curiosity

I love me some Alphonse Mucha!

(via lisamantchev)

An idea I have

So I had been thinking of primarily posting recipes if I came up with something spectacular. But tonight I had an idea. For a long time I have been interested in food advice and how it fits into our culture and how it evolves from decade to decade. Low-fat, low-protein, low-carb; they’ve all been ‘the’ way to eat at one time or another. While I’m not interested in exploring something like ‘The Grapefruit Diet’, I thought it might be interesting to spend a week, or more, attempting to adhere to some of the more current ones. Adkins, South Beach, Paleo, to see how easy they are to adapt to, if it was a lot of work to find and prepare ingredients, and if the food itself is any good. I also thought to include in the experiment the levels of vegetarianism, from ovo-lacto inclusive through vegan. And to investigate how easy it is, or isn’t, to cook for health issues such as diabetes and celiac since I have friends with those conditions.

Anyway, this was an idea that really just popped into my head this evening, there will need to be little research done before I start, not to mention I had already planned this week’s meals. When I do go ahead with this, I will post journal-style observations, as well as my recipes, photos of food, and links to any websites I find particularly interesting or helpful.

Backstage at the Théâtre Illuminata: Win an ARC of SO SILVER BRIGHT

theatre-illuminata:

Things are never easy for Beatrice Shakespeare Smith. Something’s happened to the Théâtre Illuminata, putting the only home she’s ever known in limbo. Her mother’s sanity is fraying under the strain, her father has vanished, and an angry goddess is out for revenge. Bertie is caught between her…

First One

So this is something I’ve been considering doing for a while. this blog thing. I often have random thoughts or rants I’d like to share with my friends, but the status on FB doesn’t have enough space and it’s kind of a pain to post a “Note”.

Also living alone, I find myself discoursing to myself when something I’m reading or watching on TV sets off a cascade of thoughts I need to get out.

And then there’s the main thing. The food thing. One of my main passions in life, that I love to share with friends. I have in the past posted photos, and recently posted a few recipes in Notes on FB, but I figure in this format, I can keep them all together in one place. I may need to work on some of the engineering aspects of the recipes, since I tend to improvise when cooking and mostly measure by sight. I may resort to “Rachael Ray” style measurements (palmfulls, pinches, and around-the-pans) rather than try to convert to table or teaspoons.

Also, I have gone back and forth on getting back to jewelry making, mostly beading, and creating an eBay or Amazon store, and may use this for that as well, at least as a place to link from if nothing else.

Well, that’s the main points of the introduction, more as events unfold. :)